Relating to the Child when giving a lesson
by Dr. David Fleischacker
Most of the lessons will provide some details on how to give the lesson itself to a child, such as sitting to the right, holding the material in X fashion. What I will provide here are some general guidelines on giving lessons. In general, the point of a lesson is to help a child learn the steps involved in being able to complete some activity and taste of its fruits.
An activity that is just right will have steps to its fruit that are neither too easy nor too difficult for the child to learn. Also, as much as possible, the memory of these steps should be so profound that the child can then repeat these on their own until they do perfect it, and they are able to perfect it on their own because they have the perfect way forward in their minds.
Generally, the steps or “operations” should grow in complexity with the child’s own growth. Never underestimate what is too hard for a child. It is amazing how much they can remember when they have chosen to do the work.
To figure out which steps are needed, a teacher or parent should carry out what is called task or operational analysis. Many of the standard Montessori lessons have gone through this kind of analysis for you, but if something is not working, then you may need to make adjustments. Or if it is a new material or subject and no lesson exists yet, then one needs to develop these steps. To do so, this involves
- The teacher must perfect the task first and get the job done right in a perfected way,
- Think back over every single movement that lead to completing the task with perfection. This is to break it into discreet steps. This is task analysis.
- Figure out which are the most important steps that a child needs to learn, and which steps are most difficult for the child to learn. You might need to experiment with a group of children to figure this out. Once you do hit on the right setup, then return to the students and say how you figured out a better way to show them and ask them if you could show them again.
- Practice how to show each step–especially the most important steps and the most difficult steps–in a clear and memorable way to the child until one as a teacher carries out this demonstration seamlessly and without error. Then one is ready to show the lesson to the child. As a note, if this is new, or you have had to adapt a lesson to the particular needs of a child, then
- Observe carefully how the child is responding to each step of the lesson and notice if and how the child then repeats the lesson. You likely will need to make adjustments and that is normal. Life is largely a self-correcting process of learning.
Not all steps need to be demonstrated with great clarity, either because it is something the child can already do with ease, or it is something that will be easy for the child to learn. If in doubt, show it with clarity and in a memorable fashion. Some children pick up on things even when not shown with clarity, others need more time. You will get to know the child as you advance as a teacher or parent. Be patient with yourself and enjoy becoming a greater teacher yourself in the way that God is patient with you as a loving Father.
It is important that you not be impatient or rushed in going through each step. Practice each step in a lesson until it becomes like an old, trusted, endeared friend. Once you have it down, go through it every so often. It should be something that eases your mind and can even be a moment of peace and meditation for you upon God’s creation. The steps given, as you will learn, really are attuning you to the details of God’s creation, hence of God’s creativity, and God’s love. Thus, each step in a lesson will become like a little joy in your soul coming from God as a gift. Then, when you show a child this lession, this state of presence to each step will then glow in you like a light to the child who will then come to see that same light of each step, and the child will absorb the importance of going through these steps, getting them down just right in the tenderness of his or her heart. This will help to break them from the tendency to rush over God’s creation as something to be used for pragmatic purposes. Taking the time to take care of things because they are good, and thus do things well, is to become more like God himself in his love for all of us and each part of creation. At the end of the day, we should sing forth from our hearts that all is good.
You will find that as a child grows, you will presume that various skills and abilities are presupposed in later lessons. Do not make them demonstrate what has already been learn, yet do each step with great care.
As a warning, do not take seriously all the pressures from others to get a child through certain numbers of lessons each day, week, or even year. Children will feed on lessons and get all that God wants them to have if setup and delivered in a loving, lively, free environment. You will find each one of them far surpassing what they would have learned in a standard classroom school.
On a regular basis, it is better to bring them into the cosmos and creation because it will awaken them, and then their questions will flow. Let them come to you with their questions when they want to ask you. Let them come to you for help when they ask for help. Once in a awhile, you can offer these things, but too often we interfere with their own interior teacher, and this causes deformities to grow. As you grow in wisdom, you will begin to see those few and far between moments when offering unsolicited help will be helpful. But start by not offering it. Observe. You can of course alway offer things to groups of children and see who steps up (I am going to show how X is done, would anyone like to see?). This mode of relating to a child is foreign to our modern sensibilities and productivity. We think it quite inefficient, much like the time that seems wasted waiting for a small child to get 10 feet down the sidewalk. But trust in those who have tried this way over and over, it is not a waste. In fact, the way of efficiency used for formation of virtue is in reality the way of waste. There are plenty of studies that reveal how little is learned by a child not in a state to learn, which is the state of most of the children at any given time and day in a standard classrooom. We need to let the inner teacher be the teacher, and not us as teachers.